Me: *before I take my first bite*
Mom: is it good?
I’m dead hahaha
Dreams would be much more fun if they were multi-player servers that other sleeping people could join.
So every morning I get off the train and start my 20 minute walk to work, and there’s this guy who’s always like 3 steps ahead of me and always beats me to the street corner bc I get stopped by the light and he passes it. but today I was ahead of him for the first time and he RUNS in front of me, turns around and goes “I’ve been winning for 2 months now, can’t stop now, have a good day, see you tomorrow.” tmrw I swear i’m wearing running shoes to work.
When I think about some of the decisions I’ve made recently:
what is it
maybe it’s a nimbus 2000
when the bae is horny but u sleeping
What is it?
Going into cardiac arrest here…
Jo is pressing up against his crotch region, trying to squeeze through, so he says because he’s gonna cum in his pants.
Brick, where’d you get a hand grenade?